For Lauren Sisler, nostalgia comes wrapped in the familiar crackle of VHS tapes.
Each time she pops one in, it whisks her back to the lively gymnastics meets of her childhood, where the road trips with her family were filled with anticipation and excitement.
“We’d jump in the car and travel for hours,” Sisler reminisces, her voice tinged with warmth.
She can still hear her parents’ voices ringing out from the crowd, cheering her on, especially her dad’s distinct whistle and the affectionate nickname, “Woe.”
However, amidst the joy of those memories lies a haunting silence—a cry for help that never pierced through the laughter and applause.
It was a silence that echoed throughout her childhood, even as opioid addiction quietly took hold of both her parents, tearing their lives apart.
“They just felt so much shame and wanted to maintain the façade that everything was fine,” she reflects. “But everything wasn’t fine.”
Tragedy Strikes
In March 2003, tragedy struck when Lauren was just 18.
Her father called with heartbreaking news: her mother, Lesley, had passed away at the young age of 45.
Tragically, when Lauren returned to rural Virginia, she found that her father, George—known as Butch—had also succumbed to the same fate, just hours later.
At only 52, he had taken a fentanyl patch from the freezer, leading to an overdose, mirroring the earlier tragedy of his wife.
The reality was devastating: George was found on the kitchen floor, and Lesley on the porch.
This tragic turn of events stemmed from a long history of unnoticed struggles, beginning with routine surgery and the prescription of pain medications.
The heartbreaking collapse of the family came as a shock, leaving Lauren and her brother Allen with a staggering funeral bill and a foreclosure notice on their family home.
“It’s like someone takes a baseball bat to your life and shatters it into a million pieces,” she says, her voice heavy with the weight of her loss.
Lingering Scars
Now at 39 and residing in Birmingham, Alabama, Sisler reflects on the lasting impact of that fateful day.
The memories still sting, evoked by the scent of freshly cut grass or when she sees college football players taking pain pills.
It has shaped how she approaches her career and her family, especially the conversations she has with her 15-month-old son, Mason.
For a time, Sisler ran away from her painful reality, crafting a narrative that excluded the shadows of addiction and overdose.
However, in recent years, she has confronted her past, piecing together the fragmented memories of her childhood and answering the lingering questions.
This journey culminated in her new book, Shatterproof, which details her path from shame to the celebratory moments she shares on ESPN every Saturday.
Facing the Truth
Writing the book compelled Sisler to explore difficult emotions and memories she had kept at bay for so long.
“It forced me to dig into things and areas that I had never wanted to open the door on,” she admits.
She recognizes now that the signs were there all along, often disguised as normalcy.
“My parents would walk around the house—or we’d be on our way to gymnastics meets—with fentanyl suckers in their mouths,” she recalls.
At the time, it seemed ordinary to her.
Similarly, her mom’s habit of writing $10 checks to the power company just to keep the lights on didn’t raise any alarms for Lauren.
It wasn’t until later that she grasped the full picture of their financial struggles.
She recalls her father’s odd behavior while watching movies like A Knight’s Tale, falling asleep every ten minutes, remote control still in hand.
“I thought it was just a little strange,” Sisler says, not yet aware of the deeper issues at play.
Unraveling the Lies
As she entered her teenage years, warning signs began to emerge, especially as arguments between her parents escalated.
“I later found out my dad was taking my mom’s medication,” she shares, still astonished at how blind she had been to the truth.
Even when her father was found unresponsive on the couch on the eve of Thanksgiving in 2002, she was misled about the cause of his condition.
Sisler learned later that he had sucked on a fentanyl patch, fully aware of the risks.
The narrative she was given—of a bad reaction to his blood pressure medication—masked the grim reality.
Throughout these struggles, Sisler clung to a facade of normalcy, which made the unraveling of her family even more shocking when it finally came to light.
The Aftermath of Loss
After her parents’ deaths, Sisler faced the harsh reality of their lack of a will.
“Their cars were repossessed, the house went into foreclosure, and everything we owned was boxed up and shipped off to an auction,” she recalls with pain.
Her brother, serving in the Navy at the time, managed to reclaim some family heirlooms thanks to the support of their community.
They raised money to ensure the family had something left amidst the chaos.
Reflecting on the aftermath, Sisler realized that her focus needed to shift.
The stories behind the games became her priority. “It has really helped me to dig under the surface,” she says.
At the same time, she has maintained a cautious distance from pain medications, ensuring she steers clear of anything that could lead her down the same dark path her parents traveled.
A Commitment to Openness
In her journey toward healing, Sisler has made a commitment to foster open and honest conversations within her own family.
“I just wish my parents would have been more open,” she says, expressing a deep desire that could have altered the trajectory of their lives.
All she longs to hear is, “We need help.”
Now, as she navigates motherhood and her career, Sisler remains vigilant, determined to break the cycle of silence and shame that plagued her childhood.
She carries the lessons learned from her past, vowing to ensure that her own family never experiences the devastating loss she endured.
The road ahead may be challenging, but Sisler is ready to face it, equipped with her story and the resolve to create a better future for her son.
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